June 2, 2008 (in discob.multiply.com)

Hello,

Do you know what I just figured? Lately, the music that bangs my head accidentally, means something to me, and, sometimes, it hits my feelings like a bomb. Like just now, I was listening to September’s “Cry For You” (great house song, similar beat to my another fav of mine.. more on that later), and out of nothing the piano of Alicia’s “Like You’ll Never See Me Again” starts playing! But you probably don’t know what’s so big about it… well, you may or may not have read the lyrics, but here’s the most touching part of the song:
“So every time you hold me

Hold me like this is the last time

Every time you kiss me

Kiss me like you’ll never see me again

Every time you touch me

Touch me like this is the last time

Promise that you’ll love me

Love me like you’ll never see me again”

You just gotta agree with me when I say that what is written there is touching! You might even remember me once typing in one of my old blog entries that I wished I had a “you”… I guess that’s where this song falls in, the “you” or “we” factor. A long way to go ’til I get there, I suppose… but I can always dream about it, right?

I do suppose that certain things can’t just be given to you just like that, ’cause you will take it for granted.


Oh well… Music does hit me like a bomb, I suppose. Music makes me wonder how it would be like to have that person. Or feel that feeling. Or live your dream.

There are so many it ‘s in my life that I actually wonder if I am normal.


It does sort of suck to be me: feelings always under control, heart always under close control, mind always supervising every move, every change and every spot that changes in my heart’s “mind”. I do think that our mind and heart have independent minds of their own. I do think that both have to clash. It’s almost like we have sort of 3 spirits in us: one is your logical self at a 100%, another one is your emotional self at a 100%, and the last one is your 50/50 self, the one that struggles between both spirits, the soul that acts out to the world. And I guess I don’t allow myself to fall into the emotional zone that much, not that it is dangerous, but simply because it’s not where I want to be. It drains too much of you, and it’s easier if you just ignore those problems when they are that small.


You by now must be thinking I’m a cold hearted b*tch.

And, well, let me tell you something, I can be. If I want to cut out emotion, I can. Not that I have done that recently (and I am being true with you, trust me), but I have done it in the past. Hit the wrong button too many times and I simply click the eject button in me.

I guess I haven’t found that person. The person who I simply can’t eject. Or even the person who I can eject if I want to, but simply don’t want to, because the feeling of being around that person is simply overwhelming. Do you get what I mean?


Music hits my feeling either for the sound of their beat, or the lyrics that they carry. And I guess I’m done writing. Exposure is nice at times, so I guess I’m gonna leave you with some of my all-time favorite songs.


Flaws and All – Beyonce

Irreplaceable – Beyonce

Like You’ll Never See Me Again – Alicia Keys

If I Ain’t Got You – Alicia Keys

Something About Us – Daft Punk

So She Dances – Josh Groban

Ordinary People – John Legend

I Want You – Moloko

Pilots – Goldfrapp

Black Cherry – Goldfrapp

Hometown Glory – Adele

Cool – Gwen Stefani

We Belong Together – Mariah Carey

Samskeyti – Sigur Ros


And there are some more…


Thanks again for reading me

Dann