Your smile used to be the light of my day.
And your laugh used to be my comfort.

You were all that I trully cared about.
And you were the one.
Yes, I admit it: I loved you.

But that all ended.
Something was missing:
My all wasn’t enough.

I wanted to make you happy.
But I just wasn’t enough.

Though there was never a “someone else”,
In my mind I struggled to comprehend what else I could do or give to please you.
I felt like I was losing it.
I felt that I was the one who was doing it wrong.
I doubted my senses and myself.
I tried (and I really did) to disagree with my mind when it told me that it was the end and there was nothing else I could do.
Not even wait for you.
It just was too much and too late.
It has been over for about three months now,
But they were three months of feeling powerless and lost.

Today… Today I finally feel that I am coming back.
I feel that I am back on track.
I feel that whatever I gave you,
whatever it was,
Is slowly coming back to me.

And you know what?
Though I might sound bitter by saying this
(and let me assure you that I am anything but bitter),
and even though it might be inappropriate to say it,
I am saying it anyway:

I’m done.
I’m done
but
I am grateful.

I am grateful you once were in my life.
I am grateful to have shared what I call love with you.
I am grateful for all the moments I spent with you.
I am grateful you made me understand what were my limits,
What I could never give up, and what I shouldn’t do.

Though I know you’re hurt too,
Though I am pretty sure you will never read this,
I feel I need to let this out of my system.

 

Thank you.